Our resident wordsmith for the White Isle, Rose Hancock, fills us in on all the latest news, adventures and rampages from Ibiza.
As we enter the month of August, I'm welcoming it slightly nervously. It's a reminder that we are well and truly past the half-way point of the season. People are starting to talk about Ibiza's closing parties, and I'm already getting guest list requests for this (guest list requests can become a bit tedious when I'm here for 6 months, unless you buy me a bottle of something bubbly).
My girlfriends and I are getting excited for our 2015 festival planning: BPM and Burning Man don't know what will hit them when we arrive. If I act rationally there are still about 6-8 weeks left on this island, which you'd think would be plenty of time to enjoy the rest of the season. But there's still so much more I need to check off the to-do list.
My beach list is getting longer not shorter: who'd have thought there'd be so many secret coves to discover. I want to accomplish riding on a jet ski this summer (if anyone wants to take me on a jet ski for a date I'm all yours). Talking of eligible bachelors, I'm currently being harassed by some Parisian drunks as I write this blog at my favourite El Chiringuito beach bar. I love this bar so much I won't even share the name of it so it stays uncrowded during these peak months.
These French boys harassing me don't seem to understand that I am in work mode and do not want to listen to their terrible drunk singing. Note to self: mustn't wear bikini and sit by the bar if I am trying to be left alone. They can't seem to understand that I'm working and don't want to talk to them. When I said briefly that I am writing for Defected after they pestered me what I am doing on my computer, they're convinced I'm a Defected producer and I’m writing music now. I'll let them continue to think that.
But enough of what I still haven't accomplished here in Ibiza so far this season. I might not have been to Flower Power at Pacha, but I have been lucky to go to the Flower Party on the smaller island of Formentera, a smaller more intimate event I would definitely recommend. Flower Power is celebrated only three times a summer at Formentera. If not fortunate enough to not be around for these rare hippy Flower Power pop ups, you can meet resident DJ Pharma every day in a white coat behind the counter of Sant Ferran's pharmacy.
I arrived at the Flower Power party on my house mate’s eco-friendly catamaran, La Belle Verde, the only catamaran on the island to sail purely by solar panel. As we sailed there for sunset and returned for sunrise, I hazily remember thinking how refreshing it was to find a vehicle here that respects the island's fragile ecosystem. I wish those crazy holiday goers on their speed boats would be more considerate as they whiz around the island recklessly with their bubbles and bass, perhaps they are trying to re-enact the yacht scenes in Wolf of Wall Street.
I have spent this morning contemplating whether to take up a crazy job offer. I was asked to waitress for nine days on a boat, hosting a big client as we sail around the Balearics. It's not just your 'average' shiny sleek white yacht, it's a big black war ship; the same vessel used in Wes Anderson's movie The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou! Since the ship's Walt Disney days, it's had a six year 'pimp my war ship' restoration and upgrading process: this vessel certainly doesn't follow the eco-mindset of the solar panelled catamaran.
The war ship spent a lot of last year docked in Talamanca, stuck in limbo. The owners had big plans for boat parties but the police sadly stopped the first party as soon as it started. I understand most boat parties in Ibiza are illegal, but the police often turn a blind eye. When it comes to a 49 metre long war ship, the police weren't going to let this one slip through the books. The owner now hires this vessel for private parties and charters. Jamie Jones, Richy Ahmed and Apollonia all played aboard last year for some exclusive private events - my invite must have got lost in the post.
The client I'd be waitressing for loves to throw a party, to see and be seen. There are some big DJ names confirmed for his trip which are yet to be announced. Seems like an adventurous job offer for me right? I thought so until I remembered I'd be sleeping in a bunk bed for nine days trying not to be sea sick as I obey my 100 guests' outrageous demands.
I made a difficult decision, and chose a non-adventurous, penniless, but calming and canine alternative to the super yacht. I'll be staying on dry soil and looking after my friend's three month old Pomeranian for the next week. This Pomeranian puppy is Sankeys mascot and has even sat at their Ibiza club's guest list. I know puppies can be pretty challenging to look after. The pressure is on for me not to accentually kill the dog. If I kill the dog then the Sankeys house community will kill me! I'll be testing my negotiation skills, as I try convince my house mates to look after the pom for a few hours this Saturday. I need to leave the pom's side, to get my weekly Glitterbox fix and see David Morales, the true vanguard in the world of house music. If only I could disguise the Pomeranian as a disco ball and sneak him in…
Words: Rose Hancock
Defected In The House is at Booom Ibiza every Tuesday throughout the season – click for full event listings
Glitterbox is at Booom Ibiza every Saturday throughout the season - click for full event listings
Defected presents Glitterbox Ibiza 2014 is out 11 August (digital) on Defected Records -order from iTunes
